Vagina Mitten Contest!

From November 5th through November 15th, if you purchase the Clam Hands pattern through my Ravelry store, you will be entered to win two balls of Knit Picks Palette to make your pair of Clam Hands!  As an added bonus, you can use the coupon code HOTLIPS to get $1 off your Clam Hands pattern.


Notice how I gave you the option for Blue Waffle colors…  Well, have at it!  I’ll be randomly selecting the winner on November 16th.  Go grab your Clam Hands pattern for your chance at some free yarn!


Vagina. Mittens.

Precisely.  Check out the newest naughty pattern that you just can’t wait to sink your… hands into.  Ahem.



You can find the pattern, here, on Ravelry.

Crochet Steek Video with Me!

As I prepared my latest steek project, I decided to video the process. If you’re interested in watching a crochet steek in action, check out the video!

The project is my new design, the Breast Blanket Ever. You’ll see why soon enough; I plan to have the pattern available next week.

More MagCloud Prints

There are two more additions to my MagCloud arsenal:  Pearl Clutcher Magnum and Rutland!

ImageYou recently met Pearl Clutcher Magnum, but Rutland is from a few years ago.  I had high hopes for Rutland, because it knit up so beautifully.  When I first made it available, a lot of people jumped on it.  But as time progressed, knitters were finding horrendous errors in the pattern.  After helping a few people through the pattern, I sat down and start going through the numbers.  It was a nightmare.  


I remember saving the pattern and coming back to it later, but the save didn’t take and half of the numbers reverted back to a previous save.  I didn’t catch that until it was too late.  While most people inquired politely, I did get a lot of hate mail about it.  I understand the frustration, but I don’t think “die in a fire” is an appropriate message over a knitting pattern.

Anyway.  I stepped away from designing for a while after that; making a few things here and there, but I lost my enthusiasm.  As you can see, I’m back in the saddle.  After Freyr and the two Pearl Clutchers, I decided that it was time to give Rutland an overhaul.

Yesterday, I sat in front of my computer with a pot of coffee and combed through the pattern and converted the entire thing into charts.  I love knitting from charts.  Not so in love with making them (especially when different sizes require their very own chart).  It’s worth it though.  All mistakes are stamped out, because it’s all right there in front of you.  

I’m confident that Rutland is now the pattern it should have been two years ago.  I hope people will give it another chance; it really is a lovely knit and I still wear mine daily.  I may even make another, soon.  Go check out the MagCloud pages and you can also find Pearl Clutcher Magnum and Rutland on Ravelry (click here for my designer page).


My next project…

The Pearl Clutcher cardigan has certainly had its time in the spotlight, hasn’t it? You know, when I initially posted the pattern, I had mentally prepared myself for a lot of hate mail and shaming (not that I have any shame). With the exception of a handful of ladies who briefly pulled their heads out of their asses the sand to hurl some meager insults, I’ve been met with more supportive and positive responses than I could have never imagined. Thank you for having a sense of humor.

On to other things! My next project isn’t covered with penises, but may trigger a few pearl clutchers further. I’m leaving you with a teaser photo and for now I’ll just say that this will be the breast blanket ever.


The Pearl Clutcher’s first day out

Today was cold with a biting wind; the perfect day to take my new Pearl Clutcher cardigan out for it’s maiden stroll around town. My first stop was my LYS, Gosh Yarn It, where I intended on purchasing yarn for a new design (and, OH! what fun the pearl clutchers will have with this project).

I arrived and browsed the store while a group had begun to gather for the Saturday knit in. As I eyed some super soft Classic Elite, a woman asked if I knitted my sweater. Yes, so she asked to get a better look. The moment of truth arrived; being wrapped in knitted dicks has never felt so naked… Ahem.

I walked to the table they gathered around, opened my arms, and moved my hair. After a few moments of your standard compliments, a woman exclaims, ” I WAS JUST LOOKING AT THAT PATTERN ON RAVELRY!” She pressed the women to look closer, could they see it? And a wave of realization creeped in and the laughter ensued. They got a chuckle and poked fun at the people who couldn’t see it right away, then laughed harder when it came to them.

The Pearl Clutcher cardigan was a success. One lady took a picture for her Instagram, the topic turned to steeks and fair isle, I grabbed the yarn I needed, and went on my way.

On my way home, I stopped at a busy pizza parlor. No one noticed my cardigan. Then a stopped by Barnes and Noble. Still, no one noticed. I imagine that beyond fiber enthusiasts, most people won’t notice the details of a sweater.

You can knit the Pearl Clutcher and still where it out. I mean, it’s meant to be worn and it is quite warm; stranded wool knits are perfect for those bitter winter days. I’d love to see some finished projects and would be thrilled to see photos of your FOs!